Wednesday, August 21, 2002

Fuck wanking your guitar, KILLING it is a lot cooler and at least it shows you have got a satisfying sexlife (or not?). That's right I'm talking about and you will know us by the stupid jokes the Whale cracks about our name... who will conquer the stage tomorrowafternoon and show us exactly why Millionaire sucks and Jane's Addiction are bunch of old farts! If you're not going to see them than this song is about you.

Monday, August 19, 2002

Talkin' about wankin' your instrument local boys Hypnos 69 finally released their first CD, I don't know about their abilities on the dick but instrumentwise there's some pretty good wanking going on! And to make the Whale completely happy they've put up a free mp3 that's NOT on the cd! Why they didn't put it on there sure is an astral mystery to me...
I know a lot of you wimps are going to the Puke'elpopfestival just to see 'our instruments are like our dicks : we can wank'em all day long' Motorpsycho play some Sharphillcitycoffeeshopbackgroundmusic (not the dutch kind of coffeeshop you onetrackmind motherfucker)! Well I say FUCK Motorpsycho for once, you seen'em what? a MILLION times already! Go check out hot babes The Donnas, they'll kick Motorpussy's ass any day! They're a rock'n'rollmachine who can take on 40 boys in 40 nights and still be hyperactive! So move your doped up ass to the The Donnasstage and maybe if your lucky you'll even get one of the Donnas alone!
I've been getting a lot of reactions to the Killerwhalepage and what surprises the Whale very much is that you people seem to think I'm very funny. I'm not funny goddamnit, I'm fucking serious. I'm pouring my motherfuckin' heart and soul out on these pages and you fuckers seem to treat it like a cheap laugh. Well you better start taking this stuff serious or the wrath of the Whale will come down on you! So watch out 'cause next time you have a chuckle while reading the Whalepage, the Killerwhalecurse will hit your genitals like only a Killerwhalecurse can and you will wish you were born a eunuch!